The other day over lunch with a good friend of mine I mentioned how thankful I am that God gave me a gay son. At first, my friend looked confused by the statement. I could see it on her face. How could I be thankful for having a gay son? Just to be clear, I would not have chosen this life for him; and furthermore, he would never have chosen it either. Members of the LGBTQ community face obstacles that often make their lives more painful. Having a gay son produced pain for me as well, but God has a knack for taking painful circumstances and transforming them into something beautiful. So, when my friend asked why I was thankful for having a gay son I offered more than handful of examples:
Growing up in my family there was a saying that I heard repeatedly, “What happens in this house stays in this house!” Perhaps, you may have heard
those words in your home too. My family was very careful to never let their “dirty laundry” be exposed. Keeping their dirty laundry private shielded them from the possible judgement and rejection from their family and peers. When I heard those words I knew that I needed to keep my mouth shut.
Isn’t it funny how oblivious we can be to some very obvious things in our lives?
For the first 28 years of my life I thought that I was invincible. I was the guy who raced my Mustang through the neighborhood, and would ride my motorcycle 100 miles per hour down the highway. I thought I was completely in control of everything. But then my wife Lynn had a miscarriage and we lost our first child. I started to question if there really was a God.
As an adolescent, my son Greg Jr. and I would frequently have conflicts and in most cases, it was always over the same issue, follow-through. It could be forgetting to cut the lawn, pick up his room, forgetting his homework etc. At some point, I convinced myself that it was plain and simple rebellion on Greg’s behalf. It seemed if I wanted something done Greg was determined that he wasn’t going to do it. I remember my temper flying with raised voice and Greg growing increasingly quiet. My confrontations were placing a big wedge in our relationship.